Tears of Repentance

Tears of repentance flow from an awareness of some sort of  “distance” or “disconnect”from God (and others — and even within ourselves), and there is a longing to return. There is no actual distance, of course, between us and God, which would be impossible, but we still do distance ourselves in our thoughts and attitudes.

St. Paul said, “Once you were alienated from God and were enemies in your minds because of your evil behavior” (Colossians 1:21). Yet, even while we were hateful toward God, “we were reconciled to him through the death of his Son — how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through his life!” (Romans 5:10). Even so, we may still often turn away from God, curving inwardly upon ourselves.

There are things that are alien to our nature and not at all what we were created for. We are beset by many things the Fathers called “passions” — disordered movements of the soul that distort human nature and separate us from God in our thoughts. They arise when the soul’s natural powers are misdirected:

What, then, is evil? Clearly it is the passion that enters into the conceptual images in accordance with nature by the intellect; and this need not happen if the intellect keeps watch. Passion is an impulse of the soul contrary to nature, as in the case of mindless love or mindless hatred for someone of for some sensible thing. In the case of love, it may be for needless food, or for a woman, or for money, or for transient glory, or for other sensible objects or on their account. In the case of hatred, it may be for any of the things mentioned, or for someone on account of these things. Again, vice is the wrong use of our conceptual images of things, which leads us to misuse the things themselves. (St. Maximus the Confessor, Four Hundred Texts on Love, 2:15-17)

The powers of the soul were given to us by God for doing good, but when we misuse them, we create the passions. The passions were not planted in us by God, but we ourselves bring them about through our negligence. Yet, the Fathers did not teach that passions must be annihilated — but they must be transfigured.

So we are given the gift of repentance. Repentance is not merely sorrow over wrongdoing but it is a cleansing, a purging of the distortions that have clung to us. When we weep with godly sorrow, it is not because we are being diminished. Quite the opposite, it is because we are being restored. Something is being discerned in us, uprooted in us.

Tears of repentance are not the product of human effort. St. John Climacus, in The Ladder of Divine Ascent, speaks of tears as a second baptism, a gift from God to the humble. Do not force them, or try to work them up — that will do you no good — but do not try to hold them back, either. Let them simply come, for they are healing. When we weep in repentance, the heart is being softened, and the passions are being loosed. The tears we shed mark the nearness of our freedom.

The man who sighs over his soul for but one hour is greater than he who raises the dead by his prayer while dwelling amid many men. The man who is deemed worthy to see himself is greater than he who is deemed worthy to see the angels, for the latter has communion through his bodily eyes, but the former through the eyes of his soul. (St. Isaac the Syrian, Ascetical Homilies)

The end of the Christian life not a cold detachment, but a love that is free, pure, and fully rooted in God. When the soul has brought the passions to their proper us, it is illumined by divine love and becomes like God in all things, with a heart of compassion.

And what is a merciful heart? It is a heart burning with compassion for the whole of creation, for humans, for birds, for animals, and even for demons and all creatures. From the memory and contemplation of them, his eyes flow with tears. Due to great patience, his heart becomes small, and he cannot bear to hear or see any harm of even the slightest sorrow happening in creation. And because of this, he offers prayers with tears at all times. (St. Isaac the Syrian, Ascetical Homilies)

Tears of repentance mean that things are 
being uprooted in you that do not belong. 
Let them flow freely, for they are 
a gift from God, and your 
deliverance is at hand.

An Interesting Thing About the Saints

An interesting thing about the great saints is that while others experienced them as holy, they experienced themselves as sinful. St. Paul said, “Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners — of whom I am the worst” (1 Timothy 1:15). And Lord Jesus said, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance” (Luke 5:31-32). The following story is told of Abba Sisoes (d. 429), one of the great Desert Fathers of the ancient Egyptian desert (his feast day is observed on July 6):

When Abba Sisoes was about to die, and the fathers were sitting with him, they saw that his face was shining like the sun. He said unto them, “Behold, Abba Anthony has come.” After a little while he said again, “Behold, the company of prophets has come,” and his face shone twice as bright. Suddenly, he became as one speaking with someone else, and the fathers sitting there asked him, “Show us with whom you are speaking, father.”

Immediately, Abba Sisoes said to them, “Behold, the angels came to take me away and I asked them to leave me so that I might tarry here a little longer and repent.” And the old men said unto him, “You have no need to repent, father.” And Abba Sisoes said to the fathers, “I do not know in my soul if I have rightly begun to repent,” and they all realized that the old man was perfect.

Then, suddenly, his face beamed like the sun and all who sat there were afraid and he said to them, “Look! Look! Behold, the Lord has come and he says, ‘Bring unto me the chosen vessel which is in the desert,’” and he at once delivered up his spirit and became like lightning and the whole place was filled with a sweet fragrance.*

Therefore, let us not lose heart. Let us gladly own ourselves sinners, that we may be cleansed by our Lord Jesus Christ and know our true identity in him. Let us gladly confess our lostness, that we may know our true home in him. Let us gladly embrace our death, that we may know our true life in him. Amen.

* The Paradise of the Holy Fathers, Vol 2, translated by E.A. Wallis Budge, (Seattle, WA: St. Nectarios Press, 1984)  

Repentance and the Perception of God

God is Love, as St. John tells us (1 John 4:8). Love is not merely something God has or does under certain conditions. No, Love is what God is. We see this revealed in Jesus Christ, who is “the Image of the Invisible God,” in whom “all the fullness of the Deity lives in bodily form” (Colossians 1:15; 2:9). Through his self-giving, other-centered death on the Cross, we see exactly what Love looks like and so what it means to be God (and because of the Incarnation, we also see what it means to be human).

God is Simple, not a being of parts with each balancing out the others. This means that the love of God is never in tension with the holiness of God, or the justice of God, or even the “wrath” of God. These are but different ways of speaking the same thing: the love of God. 

When John declares that God is Love, there is no “but” that can walk it back even one tiny step. Everything God does is a manifestation of the love of God that is revealed in our Lord Jesus Christ on the Cross. God will never do what Love would not do. In 1 Corinthians 13, St. Paul gives us a wonderful description of how love behaves, and God will never do anything that is contrary to that.

God is Love, and those who are properly oriented toward God perceive Him as Love, but those who are not perceive Him in terror and dread. The real problem is the mind that has been deceived and is in bondage to dark passions. As St. Paul tells us, “The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace ” (Romans 8:7). “Once you were alienated from God and were enemies in your minds because of your evil behavior” (Colossians 1:21). 

The mindset (perception, outlook, orientation) of the flesh is bondage, corrupting how we understand God, ourselves, and the world. What is needed is a new orientation, a reorientation toward God. Another word for this is repentance. Repentance is allowing our perception to be properly oriented by the revelation of God in Jesus Christ. 

We cannot reorient ourselves — that would require having the proper orientation in the first place. But it comes to us as a gift, the goodness and kindness of God leading us into a new way of seeing God. It comes to us in the word of the gospel, the message of Christ, through the Holy Spirit. For the Cross of Christ reveals to us what God is really like: self-giving, other-centered, cross-shaped Love.

Repentance is a Wonderful Thing

“Come now, and let us reason together,” says the LORD.

(Isaiah 1:18)

Repentance is a wonderful thing. Most people associate it with “sorrow for sin.” Now, sorrow for sin may lead to repentance, or it may even result from it. But that is not what repentance itself is. The Greek word behind it is metanoia and literally means to “change your mind.” In the Bible, it is an exchange of our thoughts and ways for God’s.

“For My thoughts are not your thoughts,
   Nor are your ways My ways,” says the LORD.
“For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
   So are My ways higher than our ways,
   And My thoughts than your thoughts.”

(Isaiah 55:8-9)

God’s thoughts and ways are much higher than ours, but that does not mean we cannot know them. In fact, God invites us to come and know His thoughts. That is what He means when He says, “Come now, and let us reason together.” In other words, come and learn God’s ways, come and know His thoughts, come and get His wisdom. Proverbs 3:5-6 puts it this way:

Trust in the LORD with all your heart,
   And lean not on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge Him,
   And He shall direct your paths.

Many people believe that we cannot know God’s ways and thoughts. They often quote 1 Corinthians 2:9, where Paul says, “But as it is written: ‘Eye has not seen, nor ear heard, nor have entered into the heart of man the things which God has prepared for those who love Him.’” Most of them don’t go on to quote or even read the very next verse: “But God has revealed them to us through His Spirit, for the Spirit searches all things, yes, the deep things of God” (1 Corinthians 2:10).

So we do not have to be stuck with our own thoughts and ways. We can know God’s thoughts and walk in His ways. My ways are feeble and my thoughts limited, and I am more than ready to get rid of them and receive God’s thoughts and ways.

Thank God for repentance! Now I can wake up everyday and go the Father to learn what new thing He has for me. It is a joy when He shows me where my ways have been ineffective and my thinking has been off. Because then I get to repent, to change my mind and start thinking God’s thoughts about whatever issue I am facing. I look forward to repenting because I know that I am about to receive an upgrade in my life. My own understanding will always ultimately fail, but God’s thoughts and ways will always bring success.

Repentance is a wonderful thing, and a good way to begin every year, every month, every week, even every day. Have you repented today and experienced the delight of changing your thoughts for God’s? His thoughts are found in the Scriptures, and if you ask, the Holy Spirit will open them up to you.