Notes on Headship

But I would have you know that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God. (1 Corinthians 11:3)

The head of every man is Christ. The Greek word behind “man” here specifically refers to males, not to mankind (male and female). From the context, “every man” appears to refer to every male who belongs to the church, not to every male in the world. For in the next verse (v. 4), Paul speaks of “every man praying or prophesying” (i.e., as when the come together).

The head of the woman is the man. This does not say that the head of every woman is every man, or that the head of every woman is a man, or even that the head of a woman is a man. But the definite article is used: The head of the woman is the man. This suggests the marital relationship between a woman and her husband. For the husband is the man who is her head (see Ephesians 5:23)

The Greek word for “head” is kephale. As Wayne Grudem’s article (36 page PDF) demonstrates, it does not mean “source.” Generally, it is translated literally as “head,” very often referring to the round thing that sits atop and integrates with the body. Many times it is used in a metaphorical way, painting a word picture. In 1 Corinthians 11, as well as in Ephesians 5, it is used metaphorically.

If Paul had wanted to speak of authority, he had a perfectly good word available for that, exousia, which he did not use. If he had wanted to speak of lordship, he also had a perfectly good word available for that, kurios, but he didn’t use that either. Instead, Paul chose to use kephale, which primarily and most naturally means “head.” In 1 Corinthians 11, he uses it a number of times, both metaphorically as well as literally.

Headship and lordship are not necessarily the same. Christ is Lord of all, including every man in the world, but He is head of the Church and every man in it. He is Lord over every woman in the world, but the husband, not the Lord, is presented by Paul as being the head of the wife.

The metaphor of “head,” presents a picture of a head in relation to a body. Head and body go together. A body with no head is dead; so is a head without a body. They are vitally related to one another.

Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of the water by the word, that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish.

So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones.

For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband. (Ephesians 5:22-33)

There is a head/body relationship between a husband and his wife. He is the head, and he is to love his wife as his own body. The two are one flesh—head and body. In this metaphor, the wife is the body.

There is also a head/body relationship between Christ and the church. He is the head who loved us and gave Himself for us. We are the members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones. (Remember what Adam said when he first saw Eve).

Wives are to submit to their husbands, but it is a voluntary (though not optional) action. It must be done willingly. Husbands are not instructed to bring their wives into submission.

Husbands are not commanded to lord over their wives. Nor are they instructed to lead their wives. Rather, they are commanded to love their wives.

What does headship look like for the husband? It looks like Christ loving the Church and giving Himself for her. It looks like sacrifice. It looks like denying self.

For husbands, sacrifice is not just being willing to lay down their lives in extreme case; it is giving up their rights and denying themselves every day for the sake of their wives.

Wives are to submit to their husbands; husbands are to sacrifice themselves for their wives. Wives are to respect their husbands; husbands are to love their wives—and love is very demanding.

The husband is not called the “head of the house” but the “head of the wife.” The house is not his body; the wife is. Husband and wife operate as one, just as a head and a body operate as one.

Faithpoint: The metaphor of head and body describes oneness.

(See also Who's the Boss)